Feel free to take me for granted..

Teringat testimonial duwi di FS.. testimonial pertama yg pernah gw terima tgl 29.11.2003.. dia blg..

"vita orangnya baik kok, suka terlalu baik malah . . . kan kita harus orang harus ada jahatnya dikiiiittt . . ."

Sampe skrg msh inget.. krn itu "jlebb" bgt..dan gw blm berubah.. Sebenernya terlalu baik itu ga masalah.. asalkan ikhlas.. tapi sebenernya kebiasaan buruk gw itu bkn di bagian terlalu baiknya.. tapi di bagian gak bs terus terang kalau keberatan.. dan gak bs terus terang kalo sebel.. There's no such thing as a perfect person.. semua org punya batasan.. tapi tetap aja gw itu gak bs membiarkan org gitu aja.. kalo jelas dia butuh bantuan.. ya gw insting aja.. dan paling g bs menelantarkan org, walau gw tau gw sibuk, walau gw tau gw bakal g merasa enjoy.. walau gw tau mgkn gw ngelakuinnya sambil nggurutu..

Once my mom also said to me..
"kamu tuh kerjaannya ngurusin orang mulu.. Tugas kamu sendiri udah selesai blm?"
saat gw wira wiri g jelas bantuin hal2 gak pnting dr mantan tetangga gw..

gak tau.. itu jg kebiasaannya.. walau g diminta.. tp tiba2 gw menawarkan.. ntar klabakan sendiri, pusing sendiri dan stress sendiri seperti skrg ini..

gw jg g bs nyalahin org2 itu.. yg menawarkan dan gak blg "enggak" kan saya sendiri..

krn akhir2 ini bener2 sibuk, mulai belajar menolak sih.. dan belajar tak peduli..
tdnya smua anak2 baru gw deketin nawarin bantuan apa aja.. terutama nyariin tmpat.. tp lama2 cape sendiri.. anak br terakhir dtg g gw gubris sama skali.. ada yg minta temenin ke IKEA.. gw tolak krn gw not in the mood.. walau gw smpe skrg merasa bersalah, krn dia jdnya nyasar2 g jelas..

Gw jg gak ternilaikan BTnya sama tmn sermh.. dr mulai g pernah dibantuin beresin sampah2an, bersiin rmh.. selalu tersembur kata2 terlalu cape, terlalu males, dll. hey, emgnya gw kaga??

Mbatalin ntn konser tiba2.. stlh smuanya di booking.. entah knp, gw yg pontang panting njual tiketnya dan ngirim tiketnya.. trus nyari pengganti utk pergi ke amsterdam jg gw.. entah knp.. krn gw kasian klo dia hrs bayar tnpa pegi..gw hrs pegi krn nama gw g bs digantiin.. dia cm diem2 aja ongkang2 kaki.. bego kan gw.. yg batalin siapa jg, knp gw hrs tersangkut pegi jg? trus gw yg ngurusin smuanya? arrghh!!

Tmpaknya gw org yg terlihat sabar, pdhal enggak.. tukang numpuk masalah.. akhirnya meledak.. itu jg terjadi sblmnya.. gw g bs terus terang dr awal.. selalu itu masalahnya.. seperti skrg ini adalah.. proses peledakkan.. Knp gw gak bs jahat ama org? apa yg gw takutin? takut rusak image? atau apa? gw jg g ngerti.. gw berlaku seperti itu wajar saja.. tp gw kerepotan sendiri.. dan BT sendiri seperti skrg ini..

Lately.. I have no mood to chit chat.. no mood with pointless IM.. no mood to talk crap over the phone..
I need time for myself..

E-book IT, ada yg butuh?

Br tiba2 kedapatan dl lwt torrent ada 187 buku2 IT.. siapa tau dr list judul ini ada yg butuh.. entahlah.. huhuhuhu dasar penjahat nih ngebajak mulu.. Sebenernya bwt preview aja.. apakah bukunya layak dibeli ato enggak.. *ngeles*

• • (2006-06)(1599042029)Functional And Object Oriented Analysis And Design - An Integrated Methodology.zip 10 Mb
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Genap 2 tahun..

Tepat dua tahun lalu aku menjejakkan kaki di kota ini turun dari kereta tercepat di Jerman membawa koper terkecil yang pernah orang bawa dari Indonesia (barangkali) dengan langkah yang terpincang-pincang. Disambut oleh bapak kos dan beberapa rekan-rekan PPI Bremen yang semuanya pria. Mungkin menjemput dengan penuh harap akan keindahan setelah terbiarkan haus bertahun-tahun. Bukan salahku kalau mungkin kecewa.

Tepat dua tahun lalu aku terbengong-bengong dengan semangat tinggi menyambut kehidupan baru yang jauh berbeda.

Tepat dua tahun lalu juga aku menangis meraung-raung meninggalkan tanah air dan tetap menangis seseringnya sampai puas di bulan pertama.

Genap 2 tahun menjalani kehidupan seperti di alam mimpi..
Genap 2 tahun menjajahi setapak-setapak sudut kota ini..
Genap 2 tahun mendengarkan sayup-sayup bahasa asing di setiap langkah..
Genap 2 tahun tidur dalam kereta..
Genap 2 tahun bengong di dalam tram..
Genap 2 tahun meminum air keran..
Genap 2 tahun menikmati/tidak menikmati musim panas, gugur, dingin, dan semi..
Genap 2 tahun aku memanggil kota ini rumahku..

Musim panas tahun 2009, darimana aku menulis blog lagi?

Girls' chicken night..

Bukan mkn ayam..

Tapi 2 cewe2 (gw n sin) belagu ntn "el orfanato". Film dari sutradara spanyol. Ini drama kynya genrenya Horor dan seru lah. Cm isenk2 diajakin ntn ma sin sambil mkn mlm (yeah.. kebiasaan buruk kita, mkn mbil ntn). Namanya jg gw.. penakut bgt.. kagetan.. benci ntn pelem beginian (tp diterusin jg)...

Akhirnya ntn dgn pala stgh di bawah bantal.. dan meraung2.. sehabis ntn lbh geblek lg.. si sin gak ngebolehin gw kluar kmrnya.. dan pas gw balik ke kmr, dia msh ngikutin.. -__-; akhirnya kita tdr dgn lampu idup, musik berkumandang dan pintu kmr 2-2nya dibuka..

Cemeeeennnn bgt sih...
hik2.. sepi jg cm tinggal b2.. (baca: serem jg)

Girl

Picture Perfect - WET

My first time participate in this while I was running away from my thesis.

Camera: Canon EOS 400D
Lens: Canon EF-S 18-55 f/3.5-5.6

Edited: cropped, contrast increased

If you want to join the crowd, go to here

Ketika dia ngambek

Ngambek tidak mau mengeluarkan suara.. padahal ada pesan penting yang harus disampaikan..
Ngambek tidak mau bergerak.. padahal ada hal penting yang harus dilakukan..

Padahal cuma sekali.. ehm mungkin dua.. eh.. tiga? ah tak taulah.. ya padahal tidak sering aku melukainya..

Tapi tampaknya kesabarannya ada batasnya..

Ngambek tak bangunkan aku..

Ngambek tak bangunkan aku sahur..

gruyuk...



HP bodoh..